Each Shade and Hue

Y ears ago, Kim and I saw a documentary called, "It Was a Wonderful Life." The story followed several people who were hit by unexpected life events and found themselves homeless. There is often a stereotype associated with homelessness. There is an assumption of alcohol and/or drug abuse, among a myriad of other things. I do not think many people grasp how fast they can find themselves in a similar situation. Many are one paycheck or life-altering event away from something like this. These people were successful, educated, and living what most would consider to be a "normal life" one minute, and they were on the streets the next. One woman in particular really impacted us. Once in a while, she would sleep in the back of a U-Haul for a couple of days just to feel safe for a few minutes. She described the difficulty in getting cleaned up, eating meals, getting dressed, and pulling herself up to the point where she could attempt to find employment and a solid place to ...

  Kim's Story: W e were supposed to be on a 21st anniversary trip, but I had spent that week in the ER and ICU instead, staring at Brett's piano hands that were curled up under his chin in a palsy-style shape. His eyes were pointed in two different directions like a gecko. He couldn't speak at all, and I was not even sure he could understand me. They had told me he probably would not live, and even if he did, it could be bleak. The neurology researcher said she'd seen only one other man Brett's age (he was 48) have a similar bleed and live, and that man was still in a wheel chair on a ventilator after 10 years. They had recently moved Brett into the ICU from the ER, and I was doing a mental evaluation of my glorious new life I'd just been handed with a 3/4 of a mil price tag. I had two kids still at home (one in school). A crooked business partner had left us with a mess, and Brett had just been on his way to sign the final paperwork to fix it all, including sav...

I t is a little odd that every year we celebrate another anniversary of being married, we also celebrate another year of stroke survival (my stroke occurred on our 21st anniversary). This one was even odder, because we found ourselves invited to someone's 50th anniversary celebration, hosted by a woman who was the flower girl in our wedding. It was being held at the church we got married in ... the one my father-in-law basically built from the ground up when my wife was in middle school. Even odder still, it fell on the same day of the week (a Saturday), and the weather was identical (rainy and overcast). Kim often tells stories of the times her family was the only group to show up for a work day, so her dad would simply hand her a staple gun and a roll of insulation and tell her to start insulating walls. That is where she learned to paint and insulate walls, pound nails, and many other tasks that are coming in pretty handy with me in the condition I am in! Bob had driven by an ol...

  "The road to life is narrow, and FEW find it" (paraphrase from Matthew 7). If there is one thing Kim and I have learned through the years, it is that God can (and does) use the few loaves and fishes to feed a crowd (Matthew 14:17-19). We have learned that the room becomes very empty, the road becomes very deserted, and standing on what you know that you know that you know God has shown you becomes isolating and ostracizing. The path of obedience, as we are told over and over again through Scripture, is very narrow. The following verse has helped us through many an "alone" season: " Again, truly I tell you, if two of you agree on earth about anything you ask, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven. For where two or three are gathered in my name, I am there among them  (Matthew 18:19-20). My son and  were discussing Gideon this past week (see Judges 7). Before God gave great victory, He whittled the crowd. Before Jesus raised a dead girl to life, He em...

T here are seasons in life where God does call people to faithfulness in adversity. Yo u do not leave it; yo u embrace it. Yo u continue to make calls when they do not return the calls. You continue to invite them when they do not show up. You continue to let yourself be rejected. Yo u continue to serve when they continue to take advantage and "despitefully use you" as it says in Scripture. Yo u learn to love much in the way God called Hosea to: consistently and with abandon when it is not appreciated or ret u rned. You end up with a lot of one-sided "friendships" and a lot of disappointment. There is a season where you stay q u iet as you are ins u lted, do not defend yo u rself when you are misj u dged and maligned, gossiped abo u t and cast o u t. Sometimes being the hands and feet of Jesus in a situation requires you give what you do not even have yourself. You learn that sometimes God calls you to the revolving door ... not because the other person listens...

  I was a young, broke apartment dweller without a keyboard. I knew a guy who worked in a place that sold keyboards, and he would let me come in often to mock up tracks for tunes I had written. He offered me the chance to take one of the keyboards home for the weekend, and I felt like I had hit the lottery ha, ha. I milked every ounce of time out of it, and this song came into existence in the couple of days I had that keyboard. I used the onboard feature to make a track that I could add vocals to later, but the vocals did not happen for a decade or two. This sat dormant ever since the day I wrote and copyrighted it, so it is nice to finally have a listenable version. "More than who I am" might seem more like ... I do not want to lose my home. I do not want people to misunderstand me, mock me, throw me away, or feel victorious because I'm in a season of loss. But that is not it. If I have to go through these things ... and we are promised that if we follow Jesus, we most ...

Traveling was my thing. I loved to explore new places, especially the ones that made me feel closer to God. Camping, hiking, enjoying nature . . . there is something incredible about exploring God's creation. It is even better when there is a communication that takes place. When writing a song ended up in the mix, that was a really cool memory to hold onto. Before my forced early retirement due to an exploded brain at the ripe old age of 48, my work provided me a lot of travel opportunity. I often got to take my family with me, which was always a welcome perk. This song concept got sandwiched between two trips. The first was a long trip to L.A., followed by a trip to the incredible sites of nature in the Dakotas. (I bet it isn't hard to guess which one I liked better.) During a trip to Sioux Falls, I was able to find that one-on-one time with God to sort out my thoughts with Him and realize the humility and necessary quiet time that has to be part of our relationship with Him. ...